Thursday, January 8, 2009

End Of A Chapter

Taking a shot at Melaka Sentral before we took our bus down Singapore.
It was one of the toughest journey for me. I never felt so down, so lifeless ever, but there is nothing much I could do. I have to face the fact that there will come to one time in any long-distance relationship when the two of us will have to be separated. It feels like you've lost something, something that has been part of yourself being taken away out of a sudden. I just couldn't concentrate on what I am doing; one example is when I left the bread I bought in the convenient store on my way back yesterday. Of course I went back to the store and take my bread back.
Only time will heal this emptiness, but I hope both of us will get over this as fast as possible. Like what Calvin Lim said, "its better to have something but felt like you didn't have it than to not be able to have it although you could".
Taking another shot inside the MRT to Changi airport. It is actually a reflection of the window opposite to us.
It is something in which I'm grateful for because it is not that I've lost her forever, but our relationship just took a break. It is always very hard whenever I think of the next time we will get to meet again; to be honest, both of us have no idea when will that be. I guess we just have to be strong because this is what LDR is all about. People may question us why we make our life so miserable by taking this road; it could be much easier if our partner is studying at the same place as ours, but never once that I ever regretted this decision.
I am giving myself a one-week time frame and I hope by next week, I will be back to my normal self. I guess it won't be hard as my workload has already started to pile up even today - the first day of schooling after the winter break. I am trying to cheer myself up as much but every now and then, reminiscing the memories we had for the last eighteen days will always make me emotional. I once told her when we were sitting down next to that spot while waiting for my departure time, that a relationship is like when you use a glue to stick two pieces of stuff together. The longer you leave it to stick, the harder it will for you to separate it. That is why this time, it is so much harder for us compared to last year.
We are so used to doing stuff together, that I will feel something is missing when I do it alone by myself now. The best example is when I am having my meal now. I miss the moments when we shared our meals together, how I will become the dustbin when she couldn't finish her food. Well, I guess I shall stop talking about the stuff we did together now before it gets too personal and emotional.
Like what the title of this post suggests, this mark the end of a chapter, and the beginning of another new chapter and I hope it will be a better than this one (it doesn't mean that it was not a good one this time). Thanks for all the memories throughout the eighteen days we spent together. They shall remain in my heart for a long long time. Also thanks for letting me to bring back Doggy back with me and I promise to take good care of him. Don't worry, I won't penyek him like what I did last time to mine =P
I love you baby...
P/S: Sorry if this post sounds too personal to you, as this is not my usual tone when I blog. But I am currently not in the best state to blog like what I always do.


Kae Vin said...

Hey just put yourself together.

You can do it :)

Anonymous said...

awwwwww.....dun cry

Innocent^^Guy said...

the last pic was nice...glad my words made an impact!

but yeap, true, its something you that you're going to go through not once not twice but many more times to come since u're in for ldr. And whether you want to believe it or not, even after going through it a million times, you'll never get used to it...and its going to hurt just as much as the first time

so get over it and stay strong!

good luck to both of u!

P/s: this is also not my normal tone. I usually only talk crap and poke fun at ppl :P

mg said...

aren't u glad that i decided to go down to changi? hehe.. it was worth the trip.. T__T

thanks calvin lim.. lol..

Innocent^^Guy said...

yes...i just noticed...pls dun fucken use my chinese name..i know u wanna avoid confusion...but no chinese name pls...thanx

calvin said...

@ specialhuman:
thanks. i hope we can pull through this together :)

calvin said...

@ anonymous:
our tears have dried up already from crying too much for the past couple of days =\

calvin said...

@ innocent^^guy:
it is a surprise to see you commenting like this, because like you said, it is so rare to see the serious side of yours.

i'm sure you are talking through experience and now i know how much it hurts. thanks again and by the way, your attempt to provoke us to emo didn't work that well =P

calvin said...

@ michelleg:
didn't you know that me telling you not to go down with me to singapore earlier was just a fake one? xD

yup, i couldn't imagine going down changi all by myself. gods knows what would happen to me then.

calvin said...

@ innocent^^guy:
yeala, yeala, i've taken that down. but i still prefer to refer you by your chinese name xD

Anonymous said...

i migrated here bcoz i didnt understand what u meant to say to me , jia you!

calvin said...

@ bitch:
to be honest, i don't really understand why are you saying "jia you" to me here, because i am not sure if you are referring that two words to this post.

just to clarify you, regarding my comment on specialhuman's post, i guess that line of his shows his kiasu-ness. that's all and let put this topic to an end before anybody starts to migrate from his blog and flame me here lol xD

Unknown said...

your hand is big~ ( this reminds me of the red riding hood`s story. When the wolf tries to eat that girl )

calvin said...

@ akimura:
haha, but i'm not the wolf. i will protect my girl from the wolf =)